orange_sadona

     I went for the tee today and the thrombosis is still there.   That is not even the worst part of my day.  Even though I made it clear to the doctor when I saw him at his office, I did not want a pacemaker, apparently he had planned to do it anyhow if the thrombosis was still there.    I told him in his office I did not want that, and I told everyone who would listen at the hospital I did not want that.  By the time the doctor came in to talk to me they had told him I was refusing a pacemaker, and he was annoyed I had changed his plans.   Call me paranoid, but I have never one time seen the image they get from the tees nor has anyone explained to me if it is changing or not.   How am I to know he is not just pushing for the pacemaker so I will have to go see him more and he will make more money?     
    When I said to him do you not remember me telling you in your office I did not want a pacemaker. He said he did not remember my last visit to his office just a couple weeks ago, but amazingly when I questioned more why he was wanting to do this, he said he had explained this to me at the office.  Now how in the world did he remember that and he did not remember what I said when I was there?
     When they discharged me they did not give me any instructions about follow ups with any of my doctors.   All they did was up the warfarin and put me back on a smaller dose of a medicine that I had already had problems with.  
     I am so depressed right now .  I am getting to the point where I want to just give up .  I do not see me ever being happy again if I am forced to have a pacemaker I do not want and do not think I need.
OOOOOOOOOOO and get this they said today that the blood thinners do not de solve the clots.  That it is up to my body to reabsorb it.   If that is true why am I on the blood thinners anyhow?
     I really do not know what I am going to do, I just know I am really depressed now.